Rainy Monday, Weary SoulPosted: April 18, 2011
Well, it’s raining and it’s Monday–not a good combination. The past couple of weeks I have been struggling to prepare myself for work, specifically writing devotions for my kindergarteners. The gray skies and chilly temperature is not helping with my trepidation about teaching devotion, but mostly I’m just tired. Tired of being many of these children’s sole witness to Jesus, tired of biting my tongue when they repeat their parents’ excuses for not going to church or believing in horrid doctrine (I went home and cried the first time a kid sadly looked at me and said his parents wouldn’t let him get baptized until he was older). Mostly I’m scared that I’m failing to teach the kiddos about God’s word.
Ironically, it’s Holy Week as well and my devotions will teach the children about Christ’s death for the forgiveness of our sins. Likewise, I confess that, “I cannot by my own reason or strength believe in Jesus Christ, my Lord, or come to Him; but the Holy Spirit has called me by the Gospel, enlightened me with His gifts, sanctified and kept me in the true faith.” I will not bring these children to faith, I am simply a tool for the Holy Spirit to work. I suppose that God’s words to Paul that, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness,” (2 Cor. 12:9b) should resound more than ever.
But I still don’t want to teach devotion.